P.S: To my Dita and Momu, and to all the parents, with an apology on ignoring many of your words...
The other week, I had met a little kid... We happen to know each other out of nowhere, to be precise, I had first met him in a park where I stroll at times, and that’s how I know him… We do exchange words when we have time during my infrequent visits to that park… Last week too, he was there… He was there sitting quietly on the grass-bed, near a carefully manicured green bush… Unlike the other times, he was not in a jolly mood that day and I figured, hence, he was not playing, rather sitting alone… I sat next to him, and asked what happened… He was little hesitant to tell me his problems at first…But, since he realized, it would be better if he spoke to me, he told me why he was upset… He was upset with his parents, who wanted him to quit his cricket practice; they wanted him to rather go for some indoor games… I asked why… He told, some weeks back, he was injured and fainted while playing and from that time onwards, they were not happy him continuing the game… I understood the complete story…
The kid would not be more than 10 years old, and thereby in an age in which he learns to put his choices forward, and if contested by anyone, especially his parents, starts believing that he might not be the most favourite child of his parents... And, yeah, that makes him develop a mild at first, and strong gradually, disliking towards his parents... And, at certain point, he believes with his heart and soul that his parents have no love for him, and they don't really bother about his existence and his what-and-where-abouts...
Well, this is so normal... So brutally true... And, I can say this from my own point of view and of course experience... Cuz, I was no exception and I had gone through the same too… When I was a little kid, my parents never let me do many and many things which million others were doing... I was never left alone outside our gate, and evreytime I had gone out of my house, somebody accompanied me, always... I was never let go to school alone, my dad or mum dropped me, always... I was never let go to my morning tuitions alone, I was being dropped there and picked up too... Unlike other kids I was not left with them to play those silly games, instead I was brought a huge library... I was never let mingle with a lot of kids around... I was not let learn to ride a bicycle... And, yeah, the list goes on and on...
Most obviously, like what a normal kid of that age would have done, I always complained, I always cribbed, I always doubted my parents’ intentions, and even if not loudly, inside my heart I always rebelled... I had thousand questions to ask, but each of them had a common word in them, 'Why'... I always wanted to know and understand why I was not treated like any other kid was being treated as, why I was kept away from million things that seemed to be my birthright, and why I couldn't live my life the way everyone else around me was living... Well, I never really asked these aloud and probably my parents understood that as my understanding of their intentions, and so adored and appreciated the fact that I was not really a rebellious kid like others… But, the truth was really something different, I was tired of all the pampering, all the extra anxiety for me, all the extra hype about my brining up and I was so unhappy about these that I didn’t even feel like trying to know the actual reasons behind what they were doing… And along with it, all I could see was their continuous intentions to keep me away from a normal childhood...
But, after 25 years of my life, today I have all the answers to those why's that I had back then... I have all the reasons to understand why my parents did what they did, brought me up the way they did, and kept me away from many things... And along with it, I have all the reasons to bow down to their depth of understanding of their kids’ inside… Well, today, when I see myself and try to understand my own self, I realize I fail to do that… That’s cuz there’s immense complications inside my heart and my mind, and that leaves things really difficult for me to sort out… I miss out on things which are right and I should really accomplish, and thereby stay confused in millions situations… And, this is not a fact of the grown-up me… I have always been like that, from childhood, and this is why almost in 95 % of the instances, it’s truly difficult for me to handle a situation and for others to handle me… But, yeah, my parents always knew me, the real me… That was why they kept me away from many things which would have made my surroundings even more difficult for me to tackle… That was why they made me do things which today make me see reality in a better way…
Yeah, I was a really difficult kid back then… With a lot of people to make me feel like the princess of the house, and a lot other to make me not see the difficult side of life, I was truly difficult to handle… And in that scenario, it was so important for someone to really make me stay controlled and calm… And, yeah, my parents exactly did that… They forbade me from things that would keep me safe and sound from the prospective unfavourable situations… They never let me be alone cuz, they never wanted me to end up carelessly walking on roads… They never let me ride a bicycle cuz they never wanted me to end up having a broken limb… They never let me mingle with lot of kids cuz they didn’t want me to end up picking crazy habits of strolling aimlessly… Yeah, every bit of what they did was so well thought and premonitored…
If I look back now, I see my parents standing beside me every time I needed them and every time even if I didn’t… Well, yeah, they had never tried preaching in my freedom, but every time I got confused on anything, they had helped me sorting out the same… I remember all the instances when I used to worry on the school exams, and they saying me to just relax… ‘These exams are nothing big things you know, remember you’re made for bigger things in life’, is what my dad said… Well, I really have no clue what bigger things I would achieve, or I would achieve ever at all, but those surely made me let my tension vanish… I remember my dad getting me every possible thing around that can make my studies easier… I remember him never forcing me to get good marks in my exams lest I put more efforts than I could afford… He never got angry with me if I ever missed out on few marks in the exams, cuz most certainly I was more important for him than few mere marks… He always made a point that I realized him being there for me anytime I need a friend… I remember him discussing the world with me so that I start knowing it too… I remember my mum talking to me on things that made her be who she was… I remember her telling me to be what I wished to be, and not what everyone else was trying to be…
I have always seen my parent dealing me with so much respect… I remember my dad treating me like someone of his age than a little kid… I remember him always talking to me with so much respect and regards… He never raised his voice even if I pissed him off million instances… I remember my mum respecting my wishes (when they were positive) and let me do what made me happy… I remember all the times when I ignored my health for staying up late to finish my school work, and my mum waking up at the middle of the night and making me my favourite health drink and boiled eggs… I remember all the time when I suffered from high temperature and my dad weeping like a kid… I remember all the time when I used to get injured with my silly games, and my mum crying and rushing to fetch a doctor… Yeah, everything that my parents did, I know no one can ever in life do those for me…
And, I did fail to see all this, cuz I didn’t realize things the way I should have, at that point in time… I had never really seen any consequences of what my parents told me, and made me stay away from… Most certainly I had ignorance towards many facets of life, and I had not really seen the real world… But, today as I’m having a little experience on the real world around me, I see every validity of every word they have ever said… I see more reasons to follow as per their words than I had ever realized I would do… And along with it I also wish to go back and restart my life… Cuz, I know I have already missed out on many and many positive outcomes of following their words, and that’s cuz, knowingly and also unknowingly I have not really obeyed many of what they had said… Given a chance of restarting my life, I would not miss out even on a single word…
The kid that had complained on his parent’s intentions of not allowing cricket, would, I am sure, be someone like what I was in my childhood… Who fails to see the real reason behind what his parents say… I understood, and along with it also understood that, at this point, nothing would really make him able to realize the real scenario… I know at this point, all he would do is cry and crib, and thereby would try to make them allow him his game… But, one day, he would realize why his parents are so reluctant about him being into something that might cause threats to his being… I felt helpless for not being able to make the kid pre-view the same… Cuz, I myself can see it… But then, that’s cuz, I have already gone through this age… And, since I was not able to do anything to make the little kid understand, all I could do was wish a little… Of making him have little patience with his parents, and along with it little faith… Cuz, in this world, there’s no one like our parents, who would ever say a thing which would not have a depth and an equally deep meaning… Yeah, someone truly said, parents are parents, and nothing can ever, ever and ever match up to them…
